Tuesday, May 30

Thoughts....

I wish my head would stop spinning.... My mind is blurring... Everything is so FAST


Its all
shooting by without me i just can't cope. Its all about waiting.... keep waiting tim always waiting for the next step.

My mind is taking all this infomation in and spurting it back out so randomly. Just make it stop.
I can't take this much more, yet i wont do anything else. Nothing can save me from my self, not even me. Now theres an awesome contradiction. :D

Smile. Its photo time.... Oh wait, you even managed to skip school because you didn't want a photo.....thats strange. Why?
You hated it.. Really? Hated it that much?

I hated EVERYone.....




I wanted to die.............. you made your own MUM cry.... We dont go there any more...
WHY? It scare you too much? No, I just remember hitting him... He said.

I hit him, over and over and over, and then i threw that small black box, it exploded into a million pieces....
But mummy made it better, she always did.
Ok, so you admit it? Yes... Mummy makes it better... Mummy always makes it better.

its like.... im carrying a weight which was never mine to carry. its like.... im carrying a weight which was never mine to carry. its like.... im carrying a weight which was never mine to carry. its like.... im carrying a weight which was never mine to carry.
its like.... im carrying a weight which was never mine to carry.
Help?

I'm interested. What has happened now?
Its gone....
Nope, it always returns... Sometimes quicky, Always shockingly.Who thought it could hurt so much, to NOT remember.

I saw him and he told me. No he didn't.
Didn't he? no. Oh.... Now I remember! Teacher told me.... But not before i knew already. How could you already know? It was destiny.
No, that freak told you....
I'm just a freak too.. Nothing to be afraid of. Give Him You Food. He Will Protect You. Now. Look. At. Him. Just. A. DIRTY. OLD. MAN.


When she died.... We knew it was coming.. All things end. I never even knew her. And ever said good bye. Didn't even go to visit.,How nice.


Mood:
Currently Listening to:
Word of the day:

-= Anon! =- Mail me! // djsmiley.blogdns.com

Sunday, May 7

My chat with pat

Today on freenode i managed to chat with patrick for a little while.... This is what we talked about.

Diablo-D3 sure
SmileyG firstly i should mention im not staff, or anything along those lines
Diablo-D3 your hostmask gives you away. ;)
SmileyG im a spectator to the happenings around here, and i wonder why
SmileyG gives me away for what?
--- [SmileyG] n=tim@pdpc/supporter/student/SmileyG
--- [SmileyG] Info: Smiley
--- [SmileyG] #unit-e #freenode-registry #spinhome +#freenode-social #gentoo
--- [SmileyG] is identified to services {}
--- [SmileyG] idle 08:00:04, signon: Sun, May 07 13:43:53
Diablo-D3 --- [SmileyG] (n=tim@pdpc/supporter/student/SmileyG) : Smiley
SmileyG yeah i've donated to the pdpc
SmileyG i wonder about some things
SmileyG all the things so far have been quoted, so i have no proof if they are true or not
SmileyG but you "appently" said, in my eyes, that you didn't actually care about this, and it was almost a joke
SmileyG and by "this" i mean the freenode/lilo/rob thing
SmileyG (like u didnt know)
Diablo-D3 No, I do care about this
Diablo-D3 lilo keeps spinning this as if I'm not pursuing legal action against him.
SmileyG as in you Are?
Diablo-D3 I am.
Diablo-D3 I'm currently waiting for the IRS to deal with this.
SmileyG ok,
SmileyG from the blog i've seen you write
SmileyG i had no idea of this
Diablo-D3 it may take a few months.
SmileyG and if it comes back negitive?
Diablo-D3 Then I continue persuing it.
SmileyG ok
SmileyG i agree with what you ... stand for
SmileyG your guarding the guards...
SmileyG however i dont agree with how you carry it out sometimes
SmileyG however, is there anything which would stop you?
Diablo-D3 I will stop when one of two things happen
Diablo-D3 either a) rob leaves pdpc and freenode forever, or b) freenode is shut down
Diablo-D3 I'd rather it not come to b, as I do, infact, like the network
SmileyG ok
SmileyG could i suggest another?
SmileyG rob appoints a set of staff, whom are goverened by a board of... ~12 people
Diablo-D3 you can if you want
Diablo-D3 won't work
SmileyG rob being one, the staff then....
Diablo-D3 I already requested that of Rob a long time ago
Diablo-D3 he gives no powers to any of the staff
SmileyG how about if someone else requests it/.
Diablo-D3 other people have
Diablo-D3 this is partially the reason why everyone quits
SmileyG ok
Diablo-D3 this is why half the staff left and formed oftc, and this is why he keeps losing staff
SmileyG ok, can i ask why you dont just leave?
Diablo-D3 I did, actually.
Diablo-D3 I'm only here for the moment to ask something of unit-e
Diablo-D3 I'm a dj for an online radio station, and I want to play their music
SmileyG ok
Diablo-D3 http://www.mediadriven.us/ btw
SmileyG ill take a look, thanks
SmileyG ok
* SmileyG thins
SmileyG thinks
SmileyG ok and if you dont use hte network, then why do you continue to blog about it/lilo?
Diablo-D3 just because I quit freenode doesn't mean lilo stops doing what hes doing
SmileyG yes agreed
SmileyG so without lilo leaving, or freenode shutting down, your going to continue?
Diablo-D3 Yes.
SmileyG ok
SmileyG dont you belive that if the network is so badly run, that it will its self fail? Why not leave it to its own devices?
* Diablo-D3 has quit (Killed by lilo (banned from freenode))

He was killed due to being banned from the network. Hopefully one day we can continue our chat.

Mood:
Currently Listening to:
Word of the day:

-= Anon! =- Mail me! // djsmiley.blogdns.com

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